Friday, March 29, 2013

Anticipating Trouble

I was stumped for a post subject. That happens. Every now and then I sit down and my mind goes blank. Actually, that happens a lot more than I care to admit. Usually I fudge it and say, "Yes, I opened the fridge just to ensure the light came on. You can't tell if it's burned out when the door is closed."

So, just to ensure my light was on, I sat down and opened up Blogger. Nothing. No sarcasm. No wit. No wise counsel. Just me blinking at a white page wondering "what now?". And then I spied my favorite quote book: The Book of Positive Quotations 2nd Edition; Compiled and Arranged by John Cook; Edited by Steve Deger and Leslie Ann Gibson. Inspiration!

I closed my eyes, opened to a random page, opened my eyes and chose the first quote I saw:

There are people who are always anticipating trouble, and in this way they manage to enjoy many sorrows that never really happen. ~Josh Billings

How true.

When it seemed my firstborn would never stop crying, and my first attempt to bathe him resulted in his near-drowning, I feared he would never grow up, and if he did somehow manage to survive my inept parenting, he would be scarred for life; I could not fathom the handsome, responsible young man he would grow to be, or the pride and joy I would know the day he proudly accepted his high school diploma, and a year later, bought his first home. 

When it started to rain the weekend I attended my first country music festival I fretted over getting wet, and tracking mud in to my bed roll; shivering in a downpour huddled under an umbrella fashioned from garbage bags and coat hangers; it never occurred to me I'd meet my future husband and get soundly kissed in the rain while Ian Tyson crooned on stage.

When said husband accepted a promotion and transfer to a new city I wondered how I'd manage the house and kids until our home sold and we moved to join him; I never imagined my youngest boys would step up to the challenge and take over many new responsibilities with barely a peep of protest.

When my daughter moved out with her fiance I worried that I would never see her, and that I would lose the special bond we had developed being the only females in a sea of testosterone; I underestimated the strength of that bond and the fresh perspectives and people we bring to our evolving relationship, experience and experiences, unexpected challenges and familiar habits; wisdom and wonder, presumption and philosophical debate; new emotions and memories laid down over the old, like layers of bonded steel, strong, durable, everlasting; I feared losing my baby girl, but when I turned around, a beautiful, smart, and compassionate young woman was there to help me grieve.


When nothing is sure, everything is possible. ~Margaret Drabble


Lara said...

Lovely post! I try not to borrow trouble, but sometimes it's difficult to stay calm and keep the worries under control...

Lexa Cain said...

This is my husband to a T. He's convinced that if he expects the worst in every situation and gets suitably depressed beforehand, the outcome can't possibly be worse than what he expected. I've tried arguing rationally with him, but men can be stubborn...
Loved your post! :-)

Deborah said...

Thank you, Lara. I agree. The mind has an endless capacity for wandering paths best left untrod; and for writerly folks like us, those paths can get pretty woolly. *g*

Hi Lexa and thank you for popping by...your hubs and mine are a lot alike. I tend to fret in the moment of darkness, or rain; he sees goblins in full sun. His philosophy is same as your hubs--expect the worst and rejoice when it doesn't happen. :) Take care!

Vicki Paulus said...

Loved this, I need reminding sometimes that I should dwell on the positive, not the negative. Good job.

Deborah said...

Thank you, Vicki. And I agree. Positivity is definitely better for one's health!

Thank you for commenting. I really appreciate it. :)